My youngest child graduates from high school tonight. It is a milestone for him. I am very proud of the man he has become. I look forward to seeing what he does with his life. I know that he will do great things. He just needs all of us to stay out of his way.
This is a milestone for me as well. When he graduates tonight then I will have none left. It’s not that I’ll have an empty nest because I won’t. Depending on what path he follows he may never leave home. Depending on his sister’s path, she may come back. I’m sure they will be coming and going all over the place. But the milestone for me is the freedom from the responsibility I will no longer have.
I told someone this week that I have had children in school for the past 38 years. That’s a lot of work and worry. I’ve never been a helicopter parent, I’ve expected my children to do what needed to be done when they needed it done. So I’ve never sat at the kitchen table with them after supper and “helped” them with their homework. I have made them accept that responsibility. But I have worried about them. I have watched them grow and mature into being responsible human beings and into their own person. I am proud of them for that. But I’m proud of me for that. I have let them do what needed to be done on their own and to be proud of their achievements. There are a few things that I remember about them all, stories to tell, that you might get a laugh out of.
When my oldest, Jay, started school he was extremely bright. He caught on very well. But he was not very mature for his age. He would take toys to kindergarten with him. And he would get them taken away, by his classmates who were twice as big as he was. I worried about that.
Too many stories on Carilynn but my favorite is when she was in the 3rd grade her grades began to dip. This child had been a prodigy. She was straight A’s all the way. But the third grade got her. She blamed it on the teacher who was a Sister of St. Benedict, whom I loved. No way was this sister harder on my daughter than she had been on my son. But I worried about that.
Too many stories on Katie. But my favorite one is when she was still going to St. Joseph and they were having a talent show and she sang “Red Neck Woman” and there’s a line where she sings “Hell yeah” and Katie sang “Hell yeah”. I had to quit cursing for awhile with that one. I really had to worry about that.
And then John. John who hated to do homework and who hated to bring any papers home and who hated school altogether. He liked the social aspects but hated everything else. When John transferred to Fancy Farm Elementary he just couldn’t get into the routine. So, he was given a paper to bring home for us to sign, so that his teacher knew that we knew that he hadn’t done his homework. He forgot to get us to sign it. So, he signed his daddy’s name and turned it in. I got a call, from the principal, about that. We were called into the principal’s office. Never in my life had I been called into the principal’s office. We went. The principal told us what happened. She showed us the paper. I wanted to laugh out loud but I knew I couldn’t because he was in trouble. I looked at him and asked him if he knew what he had done wrong. He said he did and he was sorry and it would never happen again. I told him that I hoped not. But then I told him that if he was going to sign his daddy’s name to make sure he put a whole lot of “m’s” in Jimmy because when his daddy signs his name he goes crazy with his “m’s” and then I burst out laughing. I couldn’t help it. John still didn’t do his homework all the time, but as far as I know he never tried to sign his daddy’s name again, or at least he never got caught. I worried about that.
But after tonight I get to quit worrying. After tonight they will all be grown. I will have accomplished something that I know my mother strived to do: make sure all of her children graduated from high school. I will have made it. Don’t get me wrong, I will still worry, about everything as it pertains to them. This is one less thing I have to worry about because after John, I have none.
