Have you ever been in a situation where you just can’t shut your mouth? Have you ever been in a situation where you tell yourself to shut up? Have you known that if you keep talking you’re going to get yourself in so much trouble?
I do it all the time.
I recently read an old article written by Dr. Phil McGraw entitled “Never miss a good chance to shut up!”
I used to think that my mother was the most talkative woman I knew. But when it was all said and done, she was probably one of the most effective listeners I ever knew.
You see, I didn’t learn early how to shut up. I always thought you had to talk your way all around whatever you were talking about. It didn’t make sense to me to just shut my mouth. But the older I get, the more I realize that silence is indeed golden.
Many years ago I went to a negotiation seminar, where you learn to be an effective negotiator. I learned at that seminar that in a negotiation, when it gets down to the nitty gritty, the first one who talks loses. What? I said. I don’t believe that. But through the years I came to realize just how true that is. So true. And it does work. So the next time you are in a negotiation and it gets down to a decision being made, keep your mouth shut. Because if you say one more word, just one more, you will not win the negotiation. Give it a try. It is true.
But not only that. I have been in social situations where I have opened mouth – inserted foot. And then in trying to fix my foot in my mouth, I stick it further down my throat. There comes a point in time when continuing to explain or convince or whatever, makes you appear the idiot. I have found in social settings that the one who listens is usually the one people want to talk with. Try that one. It’s hard to keep your mouth shut but it’s true.
Also, I have found myself telling people things that I’m sure they don’t care about for one minute. If someone mentions that they are going to Chicago I have to tell them about every trip I have ever taken to Chicago. How can I convince myself that they don’t care. There are times that I don’t want to hear it. I don’t care. So, I have to convince myself to insert my wonderfully hilarious stories sparingly. Honestly.
Having come from a long line of talkers, it is so hard to remember to shut up. But it is best to catch yourself before you make nothing but a fool of yourself.